quasi in rem

Monday, June 21, 2004

DANCE DANCE REVOLTION: DAY 7.....Dance dance dance dance dance dance! I'm a dancing machiiiiinnnnnnnnnnnnneeee

The rise of the machines was stemmed this weekend.

At least for a little while.

I have successfully completed a level. I am no longer functionally a parapelegic. The demon box has been tamed. Granted it was on the easiest setting of the easiest level. But I cleared that bitch, and it is going on my resume'.

Perhaps it is a bit harsh of me to blame the evil game for my dancing woes. In reality it is my fault. The key to the game is listening to the music and then stepping on the beat, which happens to coicicide directly to the arrows crossing the arrows on the top of the screen. It is really a very simple game in design.

Who knew?

Up until now my dancing style, such as it is, involved biting down on my upper lip and moving my feet as little as possible, at times lip synching with the words, especially those invovling a roof fire, cotton eyed joe, or, obviously, su-su sudios.

But it is truly the beat that drives the dance. And it has started to become part of my soul. This is easier because the insanely vapid songs are almost bereft of lyrics, or at least, understandable lyrics. My favorite so far is a little latin number that has some voodoo rap in the background. Whenever it starts playing the cat gets a glazed over lok and starts shifting aroud with the music as if controlled by an outside force. Freeaky, but highly entertaining.

To be sure, the game is still evil. It is not enough that you complete a level, getting the pseudo-orgasmic "CLEARED" sign, the game also assesses grades on your performance.

In typical japanese-English translation style the grades go a-b-c-d and E. E is the worst that you can do without getting a failed. I get alot of E's. The game is an incredibly harsh grader. One miss is enough to get you demoted from an A to a B even if the rest of the game is perfect or great.

There is no such thing in Japan as an "A" for effort I geuss. A closer reading of the instructons reveals this little factoid on page 38:

"A for effort is for lazy Americans. There is correct and there is incorrect. Do or Do not, there is no try."

I will do, Dance Dance Ultra-mix-san. I will do.

0 Comments:

Post a Comment

<< Home